Asking Pope to marrying me... and getting no response...
rejection!
recent PoorDecisions
sorry I don't marry dudes
28
Accidental Sex Change Operations
Had to pee really bad late at night, decided that instead of risking an accident to pee in the kitchen sink(closer than the restroom).
Sister was still awake and playing Skyrim in the living room, heard me peeing and looked in kitchen. BONUS RESULT: Got the new nickname tinklesink from whole family, won't let me live it down...
-34
your mom
i had sex with a dushe bag. he acted like we would be friends or more but instead he tells everyone what we did and stops talking me. and goes out with some bitch thats not even cute. i think hes useing her cause shes a senior and she can drive. but ik we have a connection, i can feel it. and ik he can too. hes just afraid to admit it. hes been leading me on since august. i dont know.. but something about him makes me not wana leave him and say no. i just need a new guy to sweep me off my feet. fml any advice?
single
14
Pairs of LOLerskates
smoking weed and driking 5 bottles of beer
getting my butt kicked by a Chuck Norris poster, running from angry gnomes, and sleeping with my mom(also drunk).
5
Grammar and Spelling Corrections
Spending a week and a half out of my head on massive doses of diphenhydramine, then quitting just in time for my mom to come get me at the end of the quarter.
Vomiting. Taking Pepto-Bismol. Projectile vomiting Pepto-Bismol. All over myself. In the car. While on the way to the airport to pick up my dad. My mom running into Wal-Mart to buy me hideously ill-fitting clean clothes.
11
Orders of General LMAO's
Going to a party, getting blind folded and asked to find my girlfriend by the taste of her pussy
after about pussy number 6 I couldn't distinguish anymore. Turns out she was number 4 and was really pissed I didn't recognise her "taste" Bonus result, number 7 was an old homeless chick they found on the street that made me puke before i could even get my tounge in there.. (blessing in disguise)
11
Bottles of Asprin
hunting for tag writers
THE SECOND I FIND YOU MOHER FUCKERS YOUR DEAD I GOT CHUR ADRESS COME AT ME BRO
